Is your child a picky eater? You’re not alone! Picky eating is a common concern experienced during childhood. It can manifest in various ways, from refusing familiar foods to gravitating towards only a few specific ones. These behaviors might stem from a normal developmental stage, sensory sensitivities, past experiences, or even a child’s natural curiosity.

So, is picky eating “normal”? The answer depends on the age and severity.

• Toddlers and Preschoolers: It’s common for them to go through phases of picky eating as they learn and develop preferences. They might exhibit inconsistent likes and dislikes, eat small or large portions, and reject foods based on appearance.
• When to Worry: While some pickiness is normal, some situations require a closer look. This could be the case if:
  • Your child has a very limited diet.
  • They have strong negative reactions to food textures or smells.
  • They experience difficulties with chewing or swallowing.
  • They are losing weight or not growing as expected.

How Much is Enough? Don’t stress over occasional skipped meals. As long as your child is growing steadily, has good energy and mood, sleeps well, and has healthy digestion and immunity, their food intake is likely sufficient.

When to Seek Professional Help:

• Growth Concerns: If your child isn’t gaining weight or growing as expected.
• Refusing Entire Food Groups: This can lead to nutritional deficiencies.
• Changes in Well-being: If you notice significant changes in energy, mood, sleep, or frequent illnesses.

A Dietitian’s Help: They can identify specific nutrient gaps and suggest targeted food choices to address them.

Creating a Positive Mealtime Environment: This has a significant impact on a child’s relationship with food. Focus on relaxation, enjoyment, and safety. Here’s how:

• Physical Safety: Ensure proper seating with good support for comfort and focus.
• Emotional Safety: Create a positive and stress-free atmosphere. Avoid pressure, criticism, or using food as a reward or punishment.

Avoiding the Short-Order Cook Trap: Resist the urge to make separate meals. Family meals where everyone eats together can:

• Increase Exposure: Children learn to accept what the family eats and are more likely to try new things over time.
• Build Confidence: Provide at least one familiar food alongside less preferred options to build trust and ensure they won’t go hungry.

Division of Responsibility: This framework by Ellyn Satter reduces mealtime stress and fosters positive eating habits:

• Parent’s Role:
  • What: Choose healthy foods based on dietary guidelines. Offer variety, but don’t cater to individual preferences.
  • When: Provide regular meals and snacks at consistent times.
  • Where: Create a pleasant dining environment, ideally with family meals at the table.
• Child’s Role:
  • How Much: They decide how much to eat from the offered foods.
  • Whether: They can even decide if they want to eat at all. Don’t force, pressure, or bribe.

Benefits of a Mealtime Schedule:

• Predictability: Children thrive on routine.
• Managing Appetite: Scheduled meals prevent constant “grazing” and ensure genuine hunger at mealtimes.
• Reduced Stress: Clear schedules eliminate guesswork and create a relaxed atmosphere.

The Importance of Variety: Offer a mix of foods at each meal to expose children to different flavors, textures, and nutrients. Introduce new foods strategically:

• Small Portions: Serve alongside familiar favorites.
• Strategic Timing: Offer new foods when your child is healthy and hungry.
• Creative Presentation: Get creative with preparation methods (mashed, cooked, grated etc.)

Patience is Key: Accepting new foods can take many tries (15 or more). Be patient and keep offering them without pressure.

Shifting Your Perspective: Embrace the Learning Process:

• The Golden Rule: Focus on “they’re still learning to like that food” instead of “they don’t like it.”
• Food Explorers: View children as explorers constantly evolving their preferences.
• Patience is Key: Accepting a new food can take many tries. Persistence and repeated exposure are crucial.

Redefining a “Good Eater”: It’s not about finishing a plate. Look for these positive signs:

• Openness: Willingness to try new foods, even if it takes time.
• Self-Feeding: Developing skills to feed themselves.
• Engagement: Being present and participating in mealtimes.
• Listening to Their Bodies: Respecting their hunger and fullness cues.

Final Thoughts

Picky eating can be frustrating for parents, but it’s important to remember that many children can overcome selective eating with patience, evidence-based strategies and positive feeding practices. Focus on creating a nurturing environment, offering variety, and respecting your child’s choices. If you have concerns about your child’s nutrition or development, don’t hesitate to seek guidance from a pediatrician or registered dietitian.